The World We Blog

I can be so lazy at times. I just haven’t found any enthiusiasm to write a single word on here recently – and to be honest I’m not ashamed of that fact. Sometimes its good to keep things from people. While not being a good idea all the time, there are occasions when letting the world know your problems is not the best approach to life.

So what have I been doing with myself…? Well, not a lot to be quite frank. Over the past few months life has mainly been taken up with attending college, doing college assignments and attending work. The workload at college has started to pick up now and I can definately relate to my position last year when I was starting to drag my feet and loose the enthusiasm I started the year with. The first few assignments are always soft compared to whats in store for teh reainder of the year. Sort of a cushion effect to drop you back into the scheme of things more gently. It does work I guess, I mean if they were to drop us right in at the deep end straight away we would all start panicing and the drop-out rate would be much higher (while on this point, we had our first drop-out of this year, with Luke deciding it wasn’t right for him). For this reason I can understand the way that college set the first assignment, but I personally find it causes me some problems as the course goes on when the workload increases and I cannot cope, despite what I always think is a promising start. I shall perservere however and hopefully come out on top come june.

Talking of the end of my course, I have finally decided what i want to do with myself… I think. Whilst browsing subjects that I could study at university, I came accross the field of forensic computing and it just seemed to click instantly. It’s not your usual boring computing degree, which should hopefully help me keep interested and not drop out, plus the fact it sounds rather impressive and on top of that, the career prospects sound rather fufilling. The fact its a rather new course also means that it will no-doubt be in demand however, so my place is by no means secure and I may not get in at all sadly. All I can do is hope.

So yeah, xmas time has come and gone for another year, and for yet another year I had a miserable time. I’m starting to believe that my preconception of xmas is hindering my ability to actually enjoy it. I have always seen xmas as a time of depression and sadness – well from the age of about 12 anyway – and I don’t think I’m giving myself teh chance to enjoy it. My family situation doesn’t help, granted, but then again xmas can opnly be as good as I make it, and when I don’t even give it a chance then I can’t expect much in return. Perhaps it will always be this way as I cannot see my family suddenly changing and becoming a close knit group where we all look out for each otehr and care for each other – I just cant see that happening. Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure wqe do all care for each otehr, but the difference is we don’t show it at all. However, I’m not bothered by this in the slightest. It’s what I’ve always known and I don’t ever expect any different.